Hypnotism
by Ginger Paws 14
Summary: Padfoot is a cat. A big black kitty. He can't speak English. Oh yea... And he wants a cookie.
1. Naughty Prongs

"_Concentrate on the watch. Don't let your eyes leave it. You are sleepy."_

"_No I'm not,"_ Sirius stated bluntly.

"_He should be thought right, Prongs?"_ Peter asked.

"_Yea. He should be very sleepy now."_

"_But I'm not……."_ Sirius droned.

"_Shut up and watch the watch,"_ James told his best friend. That is exactly what Sirius did. He was interested in whether or not James could actually hypnotize him. He could. Sirius fell asleep a few minutes later, snoring.

"_Hehe…_ _Padfoot snores. We're going to have fun with that fact when he gets out of this trance." _James had a truly evil side.

"_Just get started already."_ Peter was worried. Why be worried you ask? How are the boys getting away with his? Remus was away and the boys did not know when he was going to be back. They knew Remus would never stand for hypnotizing.

"_Padfoot, you are a cat. A large black cat. You also want a cookie. You can't speak English. You are a cat. Repeat it to me."_

"_I am a big black kitty. I want a cookie. I cannot speak English."_ Sirius repeated slowly.

"_Very good. Now, when I snap my fingers you will wake up. When I snap them again you will come out of the trance." _

Sirius mumbled something under his breath and fell out of his chair. His unconscious registered some noise and a cold floor but that was it. James snapped his fingers and nothing happened. That tends to happen quite often though. You can't get everything you want by snapping your fingers. James tried again. Nothing. He waited for 10 minutes before trying again. Still nothing.

"_Wormtail, see if you can find Moony."_

"_Alright."_ Peter walked out of the dorm.

"_Come on, mate. Please wake up,"_ James whispered to his unconscious friend. He was starting to get nervous. Luckily, Remus came rushing in right after James had said that.

"_What's wrong, Prongs?"_ Even though he had only just come in, he sounded anxious.

"_It's Padfoot. He won't wake up."_

"_Padfoot. It's Moony. Can you hear me?"_

"_Mhhh hmmmm,"_ Sirius mumbled.

"_Good. I need you to wake when I snap my fingers. Can you do that?"_

"_Mhhh hmmmm."_

Remus snapped his fingers. Sirius woke up licking his arm.

"_Prongs…. What did you do to him?"_

"_Nothing."_

"_Yes you did. Why is he licking himse---Padfoot! Stop that! That's disgusting!---As I was saying… He is licking himself. What did you do to him, Prongs?" _

"_We hypnotized him. He thinks he is a cat. He wants a cookie too."

* * *

_

A/N--I hope you liked it. Please review! Please please please!

PS-- I want a cookie!


	2. COOKIE!

Padfoot was curled up sleeping on Moony's no-longer-neatly-made-bed. It was a strange sight since humans are not able to completly imitate the cat's (or dog's) sleeping circle. Prongs was attempting to sneak up on his friend and was succeding because Padfoot only thought he was a cat and did not have the cat's hearing. Prongs crawled to the foot of the bed and jumped up yelling. Padfoot jumped, what looked like, 3 feet in the air. Not only did it scare the sleeping Padfoot, but also the hiding rat, Wormtail. Wormtail was already jumpy and didn't want Padfoot woken up. That would only cause another terrifying game of cat and mouse; in this case rat.

_"MEEEOOOOOOWWW!" _was Padfoot's only response.

_"Oh yea, Padfoot? That's all you got? MMMMMEEEEEEOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW!" _Prongs screeched. Padfoot hissed and ran under the bed where poor Wormtail was trying to hide. Sadly, and very amusing to Prongs, Padfoot pushed and pushed trying to get under the bed. He did and Wormtail ran out followed by Padfoot.

_"Get 'im Pads!" _Prongs yelled.

_"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" _Moony walked in and saw the disaster. He grabbed the collar of Padfoot's shirt and yanked him back. _"Prongs, grab Wormtail," _he ordered. _"Alright. We have got to fix Padfoot but he won't come out of the trance with snapping fingers. What else is there?"_

_"I dunno, Moony." _Prongs threw Wormtail on the ground when he started changing back. While rubbing 'germs' off he said, _"Warn me next time will ya?"_

_"Yea. Sure. How are we going to fix Padfoot?"_

_"MEOW!"_

_"What is it, Padfoot?"_ Moony asked the "cat."

_"MEOW! puuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr" _and Padfoot rubbed his side on Moony's leg.

_"Oh god..." _Moony fell back on the bed.

_"I think he wants you to pet him, Moony," _Prongs said evilly.

_"Oh he does, does he? Why don't you pet it? You created it."_

_"But he wants you to pet him."_

_"Oh god..." _Moony reached down causiously and petted it. Padfoot purred again and climbed up in Moony's lap. _"Oh no! That's too far, mate! OFF!" _Moony shooved his cat friend into the floor and got an angry yowl. _"I don't care! Stay off my lap!"_

_"Awww, Moony. Don't push him in the floor..." _Prongs said smirking.

_"Maybe we should ask a teacher?" _suggested Wormtail.

_"NO!" _answered Moony and Prongs at the same time.

_"We can't tell a teacher or we'll get in trouble," _Prongs explained.

_"We're going to get in trouble anyway. You are already in trouble with me, Prongs!" _Moony scolded.

_"MMMMMMEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!"_

_"What now, Padfoot?" _Moony was irritated now.

_"MMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWW!" _Padfoot pranced to the open door and down to the common room before anyone could catch him.

_"Uh oh," _all three remaining boys sighed.

* * *

A/N--Now I know at some points this may seem like slash between Sirius and Remus but trust me IT'S NOT! I can't stand that pairing so I would never write that. Remember, Sirius is thinking like a cat and wouldn't really care who pet him as long as someone did. It just so happens he was closest to Remus... 


	3. Mission Status: Unsucessful

Padfoot's curious eyes wondered around the common room. He saw a few younger Gryffindor and a few older. None were his same year save for the three boys running down the stairs to get him. Now, thinking you are a cat can dreadfully ruin people's thoughts about you especially if only you think you look like a cat. Sirius had no idea that it was only him who believed he was a cat but he was about to find out.

The boy crawled on hands and feet to the fireplace and couches where he found a few girls talking and laughing. It was of course something that only girls would think to talk about… One of those dreadful things boys never even want to fathom… How hot their guy teachers were. Being a cat, or thinking he was a cat, Sirius didn't care about the discussion as long as he could be petted in the process. He tried to give a smooth purr but it ended up sounding like an old car trying to start. One of the girls, Jinni looked down with a disgusted face.

_"What the hell?"_ was all she could say. One girl beside her started to laugh.

_"Sirius, what are you doing?"_ Liz's lips were held in a laugh as she tried to get Sirius to come over to her. She assumed of course that he was messing around… The first girl rolled her eyes and was reprimanded by the second. _"He's just playing around Jinni."_ Jinni was not so sure she liked this weird 'game.'

_"PADFOOT!!! GET YOUR FAT ARSE OVER HERE!!"_ The yell was loud and it was all too obvious that Padfoot was in trouble. He crawled innocently onto Liz's lap, continuing his obnoxious purr. James stormed angrily over to the girls. _"Sorry ladies."_ He grabbed Sirius by his shirt collar and dragged him off. Liz's skirt almost came down with Sirius' frantic clawing to get back on her lap but she finally just pushed him off. Sirius yowled liked a maniac. Why couldn't they understand? All he wanted was someone to pet him! Dragging him up the stairs by the collar was not petting and it did not feel pleasant. Like any other angry cat, he tried to use his claws and hiss but the only thing that accomplished was a silencing spell and a slap on the head.

Sirius was thrown down on the floor as soon as the dorm door was shut. _"Moony, what do we do?"_ James asked, still holding his glare on Sirius.

_"I don't have a clue. The snapping didn't work… and we can't leave him alone…"_ Remus seemed thoughtful for a minute or two. Sirius thought this might be a good time to ask to go back out. He walked over to the door and continuously rubbed his head against the wood. Peter was watching with stunned amusement at the teenager on his hands and feet, rubbing his head against a wooden door. This was such a weird day… And it was only noon. Moony was deep in thought and seemed to think he was back at his house. His hand reached absently to the door and let it open. Sirius took his chance and bolted out the door. James' and Peter's screams of "NO!!! MOONY!!!!" brought him out of his trance and he looked down. _"DAMMIT!!"_ Remus slapped his hand to his forehead. How had been that stupid? All three boys ran out of the room again looking for Cat-Boy. James paused in the common room, causing the other two to run into him.

_"What is it, Prongs?"_ Peter asked quietly. He was looking quietly over the room. No Padfoot. He looked to the open door to the tower stairs. _"Oh no…"_ He understood what James had seen.

_"He went… downstairs… To the rest of the school,"_ James answered quietly.


	4. Back to Normal: Kinda

The three boys rushed down the stairs in hope that they would be quick enough to stop Padfoot before he got all the way down. Unknown to them, Padfoot had run down the stairs to avoid just that; being caught. It was the idea of the cookie that made him continue out of the common room and down to the Great Hall. He really wanted something. But he couldn't quite figure out just what it was. Maybe some catnip or a mouse or maybe canned cat food.

So, the "cat" pranced right into the Great Hall and yowled as loud as he could. The professors at the front table looked up as did the few students who had gotten tired of the loud rooms they tried to study in. A few of them laughed but they were glared at by their friends for encouraging Padfoot's behavior.

Professor McGonagall tilted her head and looked curiously at the student.

"Sirius Black… What on this earth do you think you're doing?"

His response? "MEOOOWW!"

She looked taken aback and pushed her chair back and strode forward. "So… You're a cat? I am too." She crouched down and her figure assumed that of a cat. She walked until she was standing a few inches in front of him.

"Meoow…" he said, staring at the female cat in front of him. He purred and rubbed against her head. McGonagall leaped back and hissed. Padfoot only moved closer and purred again. He waggled his eye brows and smiled. The professor turned and ran out of the Great Hall, all the students and a few professors laughing like mad. Padfoot, of course, followed. He tumbled and tripped quite a few times but he kept up with the older woman.

She ran down the stairs to the kitchen. It was quite a feat to get in as a cat but she managed to change back to human form. The door was open just long enough for Padfoot to shove his head in. He pulled the rest of himself through as the professor tried to shut the door. As his last leg came through, she let go of the door and ran further into the kitchen.

Padfoot's nose stopped him from chasing after the woman. Humans don't have the best sense of smell but Padfoot's sense of smell specialized in cookies and any other kind of sugar. He stopped right under a plate of cookies and sat up on his knees. He purred loud and licked his lips.

* * *

Remus stopped his two friends at the bottom of the stairs. He sent James to the right, the Great Hall, Peter forward, to the Entrance Hall, and himself to the left, the kitchen.

James stopped at the loud room with curiosity. Normally this room was quite with overly eager--or very stupid--students who wanted to study on the weekend. He looked into the room and cocked his head. They were all laughing at something. He approached the nearest student.

"What's going on here," he demanded. The student only pointed out the door to the left and laughed harder. James groaned and walked up to a professor. He asked the same question.

"It's that moron friend of yours, Sirius Black. He came prancing in here and chased Professor McGonagall off." James snorted and laughed, picturing his friend rubbing up on their Head of House. He walked out and waited at the stairs. Remus could handle it himself.

Peter looked around the empty Entrance Hall and sat down on the floor. He knew Remus had given him a place where Sirius wouldn't be. He sat down on the floor and looked up at the ceiling. He was useless. 'Maybe I'll just follow Moony to the kitchen…' he thought. So, he stood up and walked to the kitchen.

Remus looked at the open fruit portrait and walked in cautiously. No telling what Padfoot had done in there. He looked around. No one was there. 'Oh, wait, there's Professor McGonagall.'

He smiled, "Have you seen Sirius?" He received a stern glare and the professor pointed to a boy hunched over in the corner. She walked past him, out the door, still fuming.

"Padfoot, what are you--" he asked, walking over and kneeling down. Padfoot flung himself around hissed wildly at his friend. "WOAH!" Remus fell backwards and scooted back a few feet. Sirius went back to how he had been. Remus looked closer. It was a plate of cookies…

Peter chose that time to walk in.

"Moony, Padfoot, what's going on." He stepped closer to Sirius… Closer than Sirius wanted. The boy sprang around and knocked Peter over. He stood over him, snarling.

Remus took his chance and slipped his belt off and wrapped it around Sirius' neck. He yanked backwards and the boy landed on his back, his arms and legs curled up like a dog.

"Sirius! You git!" He tied the belt to a table leg and glared at the boy. Sirius tried to purr but he failed miserably.

Peter sat up and looked at Remus. "What if we just hypnotize him to be himself?"

"That might work. Give me your watch," Remus replied. The smaller boy gave up his watch. "Now Padfoot, follow the watch. See how shiny it is? I bet you're getting tired, aren't you? So tired…" Sirius only blinked at his friend and yowled. "James has to do it. Where is he?"

* * *

James leaned back on the stairs and looked around. It was nice and quiet. But, there was a noise off to his left. He sat up and looked. It was Remus and Peter dragging Sirius with a leash.

"Where'd you get the leash, Moony?" he asked, playing.

"It's not a leash. It's my belt. Come grab him so I can use my belt… My pants are starting to fall down." James laughed and came forward to get the cat-boy. He grabbed Sirius' shirt and pulled him back when he tried to run away.

"So what are we going to do?" James ased.

"_WE_ aren't doing anything. _YOU _are going to rehypnotize him. You have to hypnotize him to be himself," Remus answered. He took his belt from the boy's neck and readjusted his pants before fixing them with the belt again. "Since I wasn't there when you first hypnotized him, I can't be here this time. I'm going to wait at the top of the stairs while you and Peter hypnotize him again." He did as he said and walked up the stairs.

"When mother's away, the kids shall play," whispered James. He grinned at Padfoot. "Ready, mate? Wormtail, watch." The other boy had just finished putting the watch back on and he wasn't happy to take it off again. It was a tricky sucker to get on. But, he took it off and handed it to James.

James slowly began to move it in front of Sirius' face. "You're getting very sleepy… Pay attention to the watch. Keep watching it." Sirius closed his eyes and fell back on his side. "Now, listen to me. You are no longer a cat. You've had your cookie. You are a human. When I snap my fingers you will wake up. Do you understand?"

"Mhhh hmmmm."

James sat back and snapped his fingers. Sirius' eyes flickered open and he looked around.

"Dónde estoy Yo? POR QUÉ ESTOY YO PARLANTE Español?! PRONGS!! Qué hacía usted hacer reunirse?!" _(("W__here am I? WHY AM I SPEAKING SPANISH?! PRONGS!! What did you do to me!?"))_ He continued ranting and pacing around the Great Hall.

"Prongs? Did you forget to tell him he can speak English now?" Peter asked slowly, watching his friend walking around the room, randomly throwing his arms up and yelling what he assumed was cursing.

"Maybe Moony won't notice…" James suggested with a hopeful shrug.


End file.
